The elderly population is quite large and steadily growing. Just over 20 years ago, 8.5 million elderly lived alone. It is estimated by 2020, 13.3 million elderly will live alone. More than 77% of all elderly living alone are women and are more likely than men to live alone with age. Widowhood is the most common situation for older women who live alone. Men who live alone are far more likely to be divorced or have never married. This situation is mostly due to the fact that, in general, women tend to marry men older than themselves and, in general, women live longer than men.
The increase in widowhood as well as the overall economy are just two factors that contribute to the elderly being more susceptible to the “Holiday Blues” than the rest of us. Here are a few more contributing factors and/or mindsets:
1) Unrealistic expectations — The unfulfilled expectation of family togetherness and certain events or traditions can contribute to feelings of loneliness, despair, and sometimes anger.
2) Anticipation of a lonely holiday — With more and more seniors living by themselves and family members living further away, there could be a lurking feeling of not seeing their kids or grand kids during the holidays. The “fear” of this, alone, and bring on anxiety, sadness, and depression.
3) Reminders of significant loved ones who have passed on — The holidays can enhance the memories of loved ones who are no longer here.
4) Sadness over how things “used to be” — Memories of holidays in the past that were more festive and closer knit than present celebrations can result in sadness and depression
5) Facing and dealing with failing health — Realizing that, due to health factors, they may not be able to perform activities like in holidays past can agitate and depress many seniors.
However, there are a few things we can ALL do to bring comfort, joy, and cheer back into the holidays for the elderly:
1) Encourage “healthy” reminiscing – Instead of leaving our seniors alone to dwell on the past, spend time with them and encourage them to share their stories and life experiences. Just the simple act of offering a listening ear can provide peace and companionship to the elderly. Also, it allows them to spend more time focusing on the good and “funny” memories instead of the hurtful ones.
2) Involve them in holiday activities – While there may be activities that are too much for them to bare, including them in sending out Christmas cards, placing decorations on the tree, or simply getting their “advice” on a recipe for a holiday treat can help them feel less alone and more involved.
3) Let technology help – Show seniors how to use modern day conveniences like SKYPE to keep in touch. Not only will they enjoy seeing and talking to their loved ones online, but they will feel less “obsolete” in today’s digital world.
4) Volunteer often – For seniors that may be residing in nursing homes and hospices, there can never be enough “quality time” spent. While we all have busy schedules, it is extremely important to carve out a little time, especially at holiday time, to visit some of our more valuable resources (the elderly).
While we can’t be there 24/7, if we just did some of the above as often as we can, it will go a LONG way to reviving the spirit, joy, and feeling of usefulness for our older population. This way, the joy and cheer of the holidays can truly be had by ALL!
Until next time…
Happy and Blessed Holiday Wishes!
Traci
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A kind, thoughtful and timely article, bless you
Blessings back to you, Graeme! Many thanks, as always, for your comments. Have a wonderful and “cheery” holiday season.
—Traci