Just this past week, I read an article that caused some dilemma in my spirit….it stated that researchers, based on recent studies, believe that spanking kids will actually lower their overall IQs. Now, we all have heard the numerous arguments and debates about spanking and its possible link to child abuse. But now, spanking can also impede a child’s mental development, too? While I am not a proponent of excessive spanking to keep a kid in line (that really is crossing over into the area of abuse), I will say that I firmly believe that there are times when a little spanking is warranted. But, that spanking should be coupled with talking and helping the child to understand the error of his/her ways. My mother was very old school. She was a firm believer in the biblical verse “spare the rod, spoil the child”. However, I honestly can not recall more than one spanking from her. Just her voice and/or look was enough to let me know that I was in the wrong… and that I better straighten up FAST! We talked quite a bit as well, so it was a good balance.

We are in a day and age where the pressures on single parents (both single moms and single dads) are enormous. We have seen children being abused, neglected, and abandoned more than ever in recent years. In the midst of this pressure to be perfect and raise perfect children, some parents have released their own frustrations out on their kids and this is unacceptable. However, do you think it is “fair” to associate needed chastisement (i.e. occasional spanking) with an overall lower IQ of kids? If you agree with the notion that a child’s intellect will be adversely affected by spanking, then, what is acceptable chastisement? Is the “spare the rod, spoil the child” proverb not applicable today and if so, why?

In upcoming episodes of “Heroes at Home Radio” we will get into issues such as these and more. Stay tuned!
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This week on Heroes at Home Radio, we spent some quality time talking to two dynamic ladies (Annie Fox and Sarah Newton) about the generation differences as well as character development with children and teens. It was enlightening for me as well…being a product of Generation X and being raised by a single parent.

I can recall viewing relationships as “sacred” and something to strive for in my life. While I did not have a father in my home, I saw how my mother struggled and decided that one day, I would indeed have a healthy marital relationship.

In talking to Sarah Newton from Gen Y Guide this week, she pointed out that unlike Generation X, Generation Y kids view relationships a lot differently. They are not necessarily driven by the desire to have a monogamous, two parent home ideal existence. They embrace alternative relationships much more freely (i.e. same sex marriages, co-habitation without marriage, etc.) Also, Generation Y has a more “I am entitled” feeling and attitude than those in Generation X.

Have we, as a society, created this almost selfish posture in our young people today? Have we somehow through our own preoccupation with work, life, striving to get ahead, forgot to instill certain values and attitudes in our kids?

Now, there is nothing wrong with our young people being more open-minded and embracing and accepting the differences in others. However, we have to make sure that they do not become more obsessed with “me” (the individual) and less focused on “us” (the community at large). Also, Annie Fox talked about parents not relinquishing authority with their kids; that parents must maintain a certain amount of control, but not at the expense of being disrespectful to the child.

Maybe if we all exercised respect to each other (parent to child, child to parent, families to other families, etc.) we could have a Generation Y that is both open-minded, progressive, and accepting…but also less focused on self. Hmm…something to ponder!

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Blessings!

Traci

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